This workshop helps you navigate that "space ... between stimulus and response." For most of us, it is a space where we can easily be triggered into the reactive "fight, flight, freeze" area of our brain. When we think and act from that fear-based place, our effectiveness and impact are diminished, especially as leaders within an organization.

In our values-based leadership assessments, this behavior shows up in the leader’s "personal entropy" score, where personal entropy is defined as the amount of fear-driven energy that a person expresses in his or her day-to-day interactions with other people.

Needs-Based Communication (NVC) is a potent process that stimulates new insights and gives us new tools to bridge the space between unconscious reaction and conscious response. It invites us to "stop playing the blame game," by enhancing our self-awareness and self-responsibility. At the same time, it enhances our ability to communicate and collaborate with others in challenging conversations, when emotions are rising, even when we seem to be heading into conflict.

Needs-Based Communication (NVC)* is a potent process that can support us when we are having — or need to have — challenging conversations that matter to us ...

... like giving authentic feedback to a co-worker ...

​... or listening to someone at work or at home when we disagree with what they are saying ...

... or how we respond when we perceive ourselves as being "attacked" in a conversation ...

... or expressing clearly our personal or professional boundaries when a colleague has stepped beyond them ...

... or what we do when we feel anger rising in ourselves and we know we will likely regret the words we are about to say ...

... or when we've just expressed something in a meeting that really matters to us, but no one seems to have heard it ...

... or when we're too scared to speak up at all.​

NVC guides us to move beyond blame.

• To recognize our own reactivity.
• To understand our reactivity in terms of what matters to us.
• To see another person's reactivity in terms of what matters to them.
• In this new way of perceiving the situation, we are better able to respond consciously in a way that is likely to create mutual understanding.​
• In that understanding, we can make choices and take actions that are more likely to advance all of us toward what matters to each of us.

Here are some of the skills and benefits of using Needs-Based Communication in the workplace ... or at home:

• listening — so that the other person has an experience of being heard, even if we don't agree with what they are saying
• empathy — the basis of care and compassion — recognizing the "weird" ways that we unconsciously ask for empathy
• expressing disagreement without blame — an integral skill of conscious feedback and mutual accountability
• recognizing our own unconscious reactions and limiting beliefs —​ these are what diminish our relationships and effectiveness, especially as leaders
• seeing conflict as something to be harvested, not avoided — learn to "lean into" conflict instead of away from it, learn to hear the underlying essence of what matters to the people involved

​Needs-Based Communication invites us to expand our perception so that we see ways to bring connection amidst conflict. At the core of this expanded perception is the skill to focus our attention on the underlying human needs that are seeking to be nurtured in any moment, both within ourselves and within the people around us.

Examples of human needs include such things as ... 

• being heard
• mutual respect
• inclusion
• autonomy
• belonging
• purpose 
• competence

These underlying human needs are the motivation for our actions and our words ... the "why" behind what we do or say. Because human needs are universal — they are common to all human beings — when we bring them into explicit focus, they tend to stimulate understanding and draw us closer together.

The potency of Needs-Based Communication is in its pragmatic simplicity. In any moment, including a moment of conflict, there are two ways to enhance connection & understanding:

1. authentically express our own feelings & needs, or
2. empathically listen to the feelings & needs of the other.

These are radically different choices than we are accustomed to experience when we are in conflict: namely, fight, freeze or flee.

While simple, NVC is often challenging to embody because we are so deeply conditioned to perceive each other through judgments and blame.

With practice, the process of NVC helps us navigate within ourselves to transform unconscious reactions into conscious responses.

What Needs-Based Communication is not ...

• NVC is not about being nice; it's about being real.
• It's not about stifling intensity, but transforming it.
• NVC is not about changing other people or getting them to do what we want. It's about changing ourselves, so that we inspire the quality of communication and relationship that we want.
• NVC is not a technique or formula. It's a process that helps guide our consciousness to a new awareness around human needs.

​Our workplaces and our homes will become more vibrant when there is greater trust and care, and less fear and blame; more conscious responses among us, and fewer unconscious reactions; more listening to understand, and less listening just to respond.

Needs-Based Communication is a pathway to take us there.


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If you're intrigued by Needs-Based Communication, I invite you to learn more:​

• NVC Resources and Books
  
• "An Introduction to Needs-Based Communication (NVC)" - a 90-min live interactive workshop session
  
• "Needs-Based Communication (NVC) Core Concepts" - a 6-hour live interactive workshop

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​*Needs-Based Communication is based on the work of Marshall Rosenberg, which he called "Nonviolent Communication™" or NVC. I have chosen to call the process Needs-Based Communication for two reasons:

1. First, human needs are the heart of the process.
2. Secondly, I have wanted to avoid the common initial reaction from people in business that "... we're not a violent place." 

I have chosen to keep the "NVC" abbreviation for Needs-Based Communication because many people are familiar with NVC as a process — and it lacks the "nonviolent" connotation.

I am excited to announce the redesign of the live interactive workshops within the Conscious Leader Development programs at Basileia LLC, including a new workshop format using live interactive video technology.

Highlights of the new design include:
​

• New workshops, New content. A fresh integration of the last two decades of our learnings and experiences in needs-based leadership & organizational development work
  
  
• Workshops focus on tangible and specific workplace needs such as accountability, supervision, or building a cohesive team. Workshops include:
  • Introduction to Conscious Leadership - 6-hour workshop
  • Introduction to Needs-Based Communication (NVC) - 90-min workshop
  • Needs-Based Communication (NVC) Core Concepts - 6-hour workshop
  • Connect First - 3-hour workshop
  • Conscious Accountability - 6-hour workshop
  • Conscious Conversations - 6-hour workshop
  • Building Conscious Teams - 6-hour workshop
    
    
• Choice of two formats for live interactive workshops:
  • on-site workshops (our traditional workshop format), or
  • new video workshops using zoom's robust video conferencing technology including learning structures such as break-out rooms, screen sharing and polling
    
    
• People world-wide can participate in open-enrollment video workshops.
  
  
• Video workshops were created due to specific client requests:
  • short segments of training (75-90 minutes) that can fit into a professional's busy weekly schedule
  • a cost effective way to train one or two people at a time, or a group of 12 — without the added costs of travel
  • workshop recordings provide an easy way to catch up if the participant misses a session, or to review the training, in part or in whole, to support the learning process
    
    
• Continuing the best practices that have always defined our workshops:
  • engaging, interactive, activity-based training with a live trainer facilitating it
  • an opportunity for the participant to apply the training to their real workplace situations within the training process

I am thrilled that our new live interactive video workshops enable more people around the world to learn the skills of conscious leadership.  I invite you to have a look at the details about each workshop, including the ability to register online for open-enrollment video workshops, using the links above.

FYI: We've also updated the info throughout our website, especially in the "services" section. Here are a few highlights:

• Conscious Leadership
• Facilitated "Whole-Team" Conversations
• Supporting Leaders to Develop Conscious Organizations
• Individual Coaching for Conscious Leader Development
• Values-Based Cultural & Leadership Assessments

I hope to see you at one of these workshops soon!

Warmly,
Gregg

Gregg Kendrick
CEO  / Lead Trainer & Consultant
Basileia LLC
Create a Workplace Where People Matter™
+1.434.260.0437  | connect@basileia.org  | www.basileia.org

“Leaders must grow for the organization to grow.” —John Mackey

In a trust-based organization where people are valued, crying is recognized as a fundamental way that human beings respond to the world around them. There are many reasons why we cry, and one of them is when we touch into the energy of what really matters to us. THAT's the energy that a conscious organization thrives on ... a shared purpose and an embodiment of our core values that moves us to tears at times.

I remember with fondness overhearing a conversation of a colleague who was inviting an emotionally upset business acquaintance to come to our offices to talk. The business acquaintance expressed reluctance to come because she knew she would likely be crying. My colleague assured her, "we cry all the time around here ... come on over!"

In fact, what we had, and what every organization needs, are structures that recognize the human need for empathy (much as every office has bathrooms and a kitchen for other human needs). In our offices, we created a "gold room" that had soothing gold walls, very comfortable seating and a couch, music with high quality speakers, lots of plants, and adjustable warm lighting. It was a place people could go when they just needed a little time for themselves, or needed empathy from another person. Our Gold Room became a symbol to everyone of how much we valued the human experience in our workplace. And it was the place that my colleague and her business acquaintance went when she arrived.

We also need structures and skills in our meetings so that when a person becomes emotional or tearful, we can hold the space with care and empathy, and invite them, if needed, to seek the space or the care that they need. It takes self awareness, emotional intelligence and skills of empathy for a leader to show up with such a quality.

The acceptance of crying in the workplace is a direct measure of where the organization is on the spectrum of leading through trust vs. leading through fear. 

(Above thoughts sparked by this article: hbr.org/2018/06/why-is-crying-at-work-such-a-big-deal)

In a September 18, 2017 article in Fast Company (Satya Nadella Rewrites Microsoft’s Code, by Harry McCracken), McCracken states that “One of Nadella’s first acts after becoming CEO, in February 2014, was to ask the company’s top executives to read Marshall Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication, a treatise on empathic collaboration … The reading assignment ‘was the first clear indication that Satya was going to focus on transforming not just the business strategy but the culture as well,’ says Microsoft president and chief legal officer Brad Smith, a 24-year company veteran.”
​
Nadella also includes Marshall Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication among the short list of books upon which he’s drawn inspiration (The 7 Books Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella Says You Need to Lead Smarter, by Harry McCracken, Fast Company, September 18, 2017).

As a resource to those training in or learning Nonviolent Communication™​, we have been providing a no-cost limited license to use our introductory training materials for more than eight years. We have just added an updated version of these materials to the Resources page of our website which can be downloaded as a PDF.

This 22-page workbook includes the core pages from Basileia's training materials for the "Introduction to Needs-Based Communication (NVC)" workshop. We typically teach this workshop in a 1- to 2-day format for people who are new to NVC.

Hope that these materials will be useful for your personal learning or in group training sessions or practice groups!